Saturday morning check-in

My friend Cassie and I are like sisters. Strange, twisted, sisters in crime. We are linked in some weird ways. We ended bad relationships at the same time, I took her job and had to listen to her say "I told you so" repeatedly afterward, we found love at the same time, and our nether regions are linked somehow. We had GYN appointments on the same day without realizing it.

"Hey punkin, just wanted to call and let you know my appointment went fine."
"Good. What was the result?"
"My doctor gave me some stuff to follow up on. I'm thinking after 8 years I should probably pay closer attention to what my vagina is telling me."
"Ya think?"
"So what about you? How did yours go?"
"She essentially told me that there's nothing to be done about it. It's all about angle."
"You'd figure after spitting out two kids you'd maybe be a little - less small."
"Yeah, no. I'm back to square one. Kegals or no, It's not gonna change."
"Shit, that sucks. So there's no hope for either of us, is there?"
"It would seem not."
"Well, this new guy could possibly be pretty scary. Why do we have to go through this?"
"Seriously, Cass, it sucks. It's like really spicy Mexican food. You get a craving for it every so often, but it's not good for you on a daily basis."
"Yeah, and it'll make you poop funny."
"Did you just say big penises will make you poop funny?"
"I guess I did, I guess under the right circumstances. You're gonna write about this aren't you?"
"Are you kidding? A conversation that mentions penises, vaginas and pooping!?"